Wife no longer in love with the van :(

[VeeDubMan]

Had a project Dormobile for past 10 years. Dream was always to have it for weekends/holidays away with wife and kids. That plan was dealt a blow yesterday when my wife announced that she hates it, what it stands for, how much money it's cost over the years and probably how much I'm in love with the van and the dream and not her

Life in a spin now. Don't know what to do. It's almost finished too

 

[Clem]

Unless theres anything else to be considered, Id ignore the van for a bit, take a break from it and concentrate on the family 100%. See how things settle down.

Maybe she's pissed off with the time and attention youve given it recently? Even the balance and she may cheer up towards it.

 

[Graham L]

Sell the wife ??? :msn4: :msn4:, only joking

As above give it a break for a bit

 

[KevH]

Maybe, just maybe, she will regain her enthusiasm once the van is actually on the road and is less of a burden, more of an escape?

As has been said though, maybe give it a rest for a while and do something that she wants to do. You have come too far to sell now, surely. :roll:

 

[Myvanway]

I had same issue a while back that the van and this forum was taking over my life, took some time out and all is good. :mrgreen:


"Check ya self before ya reck ya self!"

 

[admwllms]

Yeah man, just don't mention it for a while. These things tend to be an all-encompassing obsession to get right - which is never good for a relationship. I'll bet the ship will be righted again quickly after a break

 

[VeeDubMan]

Thanks guys for all the advice.

The engine fire on Weds was the last straw really and a wake up call for us both. Just need to put it on ice for a while.

Cheers

 

[cotswoldiver]

Sound advice from all the above posts ....
My westy cost more than I planned & took a lot it time & effort to get it on the road just the way wanted it

Ps anyone seen my wife??

 

[shiplee123]

 

[VeeDubMan]

Ps anyone seen my wife??

 

[Bigbear]

10yr project? Id have fallen out of love with the van aswell if I'd been working on it for a decade!

 

[SiDev]

As above really, take a break for a while. I understand her frustration though, she's seen 10 years of work without any of the benefits. Take a break, then get it finished and use it, a few long weekends away and she'll see it was worth it.

 

[Trikky2]

Ten years to restore? You clearly haven't been working hard enough :mrgreen:

 

[VeeDubMan]

Yeah I know. 3 house moves and 2 kids kinda had a drain on enthusiasm and finances over the last decade

Wouldn't change a thing though

 

[jerupke]

Same here 7 years ago, now she will not let me sell it...... Women....[WINKING FACE]

Verstuurd vanaf mijn HTC One M9 met Tapatalk

 

[Webbaldo]

Similar situation here, im desparately trying to get my van prepped for painting as its a 'drive paint job' and will be stored undercover outside over the winter.

At present its all hands on deck but ive assured the wife once its painted itll just be an hour here, hour there afterwards. honest

 

[Dickie524]

Ditto here too.

I find that the hard thing is getting things 'good enough', when you know that for a little bit more effort or time or cash, or by having another go, you can get it better, or perfect. But that takes up another day of your time. Double the effect really, one day gone on the van, one missed opportunity to use it.

"it is a wretched taste to be gratified with mediocrity when the excellent lies before us.!" - though is hard to tell yourself this!

But 'good enough' can be and often is good enough: get the van going take it out, have some fun, have a day at the seaside with it etc - even if somethng is bugging you, and the day could have been spent improving it.

It's like anything, the more familiar we are with it the more defects we spot. But imagine yourself as you were when you first got your van, but looking at your van now.

 

[VeeDubMan]

Very philosophical...but very true too. Thanks for that.

 

[Marriedblonde]

Its the other way round in my house hold. My bus has been off the road for 31 months. Engine woes, then a restoration that took a lot longer than planned. Poppy has fought me all the way.

Fallen out of love with her. After the respray I had electrical problems, engine woes (took longer to source than I had hoped) and a huge lack of enthusiasm from yours truly. In the end I left it for months missed a holiday in her last year, missed camper jam this year as I couldn't be arsed.

I swore that if poppy was;t ready for the end of this month and our camping holiday that I will see her.

I've done nothing but pour money into her for the last 2.5 years with nothing to show for it but stress.

Just lately its had 3 starter motors, 2 batteries to get her running. So much for buy quality parts. Makes no difference.

But the first time I heard her run when the cam burn was done I fell in love all over again.


So as others have said, take a step back, look after the family and see what happens. It might just be what you need.

 

[burt]

I have to agree with most of the comments that have been said
Time with the family is so important


Your bus will get done in time and im sure you all will fall in love with the bus again as its the best feeling ever driving down the road with all waving and smiling at you (thats not by choice people just do)

so good luck to you and hope to meet you all some day